Most males, as well as the majority of society, have this preconceived notion that most women are crazy. Females are considered too sensitive, illogical, and sometimes stupid. That our concerns are petty and should be swept under the proverbial rug. Even our feminine interests are boring and dumb, and we, therefore, are similar.
Yet, these same condescending males buy us drinks, dinner, flowers, and chocolates. They meet us at bars that we like, attempt to dance, and try to impress us. Some men even feel the desire to protect us or claim a woman as his own. They spend time and resources to essentially, in one way or another, get something from us. Sex, children, love, comfort, and even just attention. Now who’s crazy?
Personally, I believe that most people just want to have fun. Men and women. Boys and girls. We all just want to play. We’ve traded our trucks and dolls for beers and martinis. Instead of the playground we meet at bars. We still cluster in groups but are open to new friends with different toys. The concept hasn’t changed much.
However, it almost goes without saying that we all love a challenge. It’s more obvious with men, as most things are. Who’s the fastest? Strongest? Smartest? Earns the most money? This translates into dating the hottest girl, the one most desired, and the one that no one else can get. The Excalibur of women. But instead of trying to take a sword out, they’re trying to put one in.
Women equally love a challenge but don’t realize it. That bad boy fantasy is our Excalibur. He’s never been in a long term relationship. He doesn’t want to settle down. He’s reckless and womanizer. But we can change him, fix him, make him into what we want. We have never stopped playing with Ken. We like the idea that no woman before us could have had an effect like we can. We will be special because we changed him.
So where does this mutual madness leave us? It leaves us with $150 an hour for couples therapy. A divorce rate over 50%. And a Relationship section in Barnes & Noble.
Will men and women fully understand makes the other? Perhaps we’re not suppose to understand why he can’t put the toothpaste cap back on, or why she gets mad when I tell her I’ll do it later. I said I’ll do it later, Jesus, I just got home.
Maybe instead of trying to understand them, we should just accept them. Accept that he’ll never want to do the dishes and that she takes an hour to get dressed. You wouldn’t move to another country and try to change the native language, would you? Either you acclimate to your surroundings or you go back home. Though in this rough analogy each person can easily consider themselves the country and the other the invader. And both are correct.
Your significant other is an invader. They are invading your life. Your personal space. The bottom drawer of your dresser. And even that last bit of ice cream you were saving for after work.
And you are doing the same. You are being a country. You have customs and traditions. You have the air conditioning set to what you like. You may even have a language that only you and your friends understand.
If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, we are all still part of the same universe.